2c: Reflective Theory Task

Critical Reflection on Reflective Practice

Taking knowledge of WHEN we ACTUALLY reflect

This is something that kept pounding in my head after having a Skype session VERY REVEALING with Paula today. We discussed what my main concern was, that is wether I should keep taking part of this course in this particular time of my life. I felt as if I didn't have any material I could relate to to able to complete the tasks.

Being away from London, back at home, I've completely minimized my possibilities of succeeding in my career and the opportunities I before had when I was constantly active with dance classes, singing lessons, attending shows, receiving career advises, auditions, photo-shoots, networking with colleagues and people I had worked with. All this is completely missing now from my life here in Italy.

So my question came almost like a sudden revelation:

Am I waisting this course since I don't have anything I can base it on and I sometimes feel I force myself in order to complete the tasks? Should I postpone it until I come back to London in September?

First of, Paula reassured me about the fact that the course will stop during the summer, which is something I had quickly screened when reading the BAPP Course Reader and that I hadn't taken in. Something I do very often when I feel overwhelmed with something, I have a general screening and I brainstorm and then take in only the information I feel are more needed.

So that relaxed me a little bit as I am soon gonna start a full time job (as a shop assistant) that will give me some savings to then move back to the expensive London....This job would have given me a very little time to actually study and continue on the course. So luckily one problem solved!

Secondly I still had the problem I wasn't sure I had the material to complete the module...material of reflection...I started comparing my life back in London when I was fully into my profession even though most of the time I wasn't actually working as a performer. I was constantly linked with people I was gonna have benefits in my career from..teachers, photographers, actors, class mates, agents... I could vividly and actively help developing my career, at least I felt I was always doing something for it. 

Another good thing I had that now I miss is the 'sane competition' and comparison I had with my house mates; we were all in the same situations, all performers looking for jobs. So a very good thing was that when someone would relax a little bit, one of us, in the meantime, would be taking 3 dance lessons, 2 castings from their agents and a new photo-shoot done...What a kick!!! I never had the time to sit down and have doubts on my career, we always helped each other out with auditions informations, sharing music sheets and networking with one another.

That's when Paula gave me my Eureka! I was reflecting.

She told me sometimes we don't give much importance to what we are actually thinking, feeling and reflecting on..we don't need to be in a West End show to be able to succeed in this course...we only need all the tools possible to achieve and learn something new.

"...having experience plus REFLECTING are the means by which you can start to come across new ideas, the means by which you can learn something new." 

(Reflective Practices - A Reader, Adesola Akinleye 2010-2011)

A guess I've used Schon's theory of reflecting-on-action here...I reflect on what has happened to me in the past and reflecting ON it making me engage with experience I have now that I can benefit from for the future.

All my concerns where somehow part of the course in terms of reflection on my being in this moment in time..I just didn't realize that.

The importance of WHERE we are to develop a career

Someone said 'An artist is always an artist' and I I have to say I disagree with this.
You can always feel an artist inside but in terms of doing something to develop your career it's extremely important WHERE you are to do so.
I thought that living close to Milan would have helped me in this task but I had to change my mind.
The job/auditions situation is completely different from London even if it's still a big city. I had some castings here but I stopped dancing, taking singing lessons and being active for my career in almost any way. Paula pointed out that often it's said that, for example, Americans are the best in performing arts but actually not all Americans have the benefits that someone can have if is from NY, L.A. or Chicago.  Where we are is extremely important and it's part of a decision process we (artists) need to have in order to raise our chances of improving our skills and our career opportunities.